Tami's Meandering Thoughts

As we woke up this morning and were laying in bed talking (yahoo for vacation days when we don’t need to jump out of bed!), Tim said, “Today is the last day of this decade!” That began a time of reminiscing over all the activities and events that have occurred in our lives in this decade. Obviously, we did not think of an exhaustive list, but I just thought I would list a few items that we came up with.

Two of my children were born in the last decade (Ryan and Caleb).

Tim got his first pastoring job (and is still here!).

We moved twice (into the parsonage and then into our current home). The parsonage was the first house that we lived in – previously it had been only apartment living!

Both Tim and I graduated from seminary.

We traveled through Europe on a scholarship from Tim’s seminary (Miriam was 4 and Ryan turned 1 in Rome!).

Tim went on three mission’s trips to Moldova to teach with a Bible Institute there.

Multiple missions trips with WOBC: Tim, Caleb, and I went to Arizona, our whole family went to Quebec, I went to Jamaica, and Tim went to New Orleans.

Tim and I went to Hawaii for our 10th anniversary (yeah for frequent flier miles!).

Tim and I went to Quebec on our 15th anniversary (Is there such a thing as frequent driving miles?).

This is the first full decade that we have been married, and our first full decade with children.

One of Tim’s grandfather’s died, and one of my grandmothers and one grandfather died. All of our parents are still alive, but my mother has been diagnosed with Parkinson’s Disease.

We have had a wonderful decade, full of growing spiritually (and, unfortunately for me, physically! hehe). For this decade I actually enjoyed looking back. However, as I look back I obviously then began thinking of the future. What will happen in the next decade? Lord willing, Miriam and Ryan will graduate from high school, and Miriam may even be done with college. Who knows what will happen with the economy, jobs, health, our children and our parents? Because of the uncertainty of the future, we could choose to live in fear. However, probably the better option is just to look back over the last decade, see how God has worked in our lives, and be thankful that we serve a God who does know the future.

Merry Christmas! I pray that your season has been and will continue to be a time glorifying to God! As many of you know (if you attend our Christmas Eve Service), every year I put together a powerpoint presentation to use there. Every year the theme varies a bit, but since I enjoy doing it and it seems as if people enjoy it, I keep doing it (if any of you who attend think that it is dumb, let me know and we will rethink using these!). Anyway, this year at the beginning of December I was thinking about why Jesus did come to earth. We always say it was to save us, but wasn’t there more to it than that? So, I decided to look up all the times of when Jesus explained why he had come. It was very interesting. In the powerpoint, I didn’t use all my findings (it would be too long and a bit repititious), but I did try to use the ones that seemed primary. Here are the words that were in the powerpoint. As you read it, imagine “Away in the Manger” playing, the lights turned down, and pictures behind the words. Take the time to think about each of these reasons – Jesus came for many purposes. No wonder we celebrate Christmas!

Tonight we gather to celebrate Jesus’ birth, but do we understand the full extent of why Jesus left his heavenly home to become a tiny baby who was destined for the cross? He says…

I have come so that you would have a shepherd. Matthew 2:6

I have come to give you freedom by fulfilling the Law. Matthew 5:17

I have come to bring a sword between those who follow me and those who refuse. Matthew 10:34

I have come to testify to the truth. John 18:37

I have come to seek and to save the lost. Luke 19:10

I have come to redeem my people. Luke 1:68

I have come to serve and to give my life as a ransom for many. Matthew 20:28

I have come to bring you rest and peace. Mathew 11:28; Ephesians 2:17

I have come to show and to give abundant grace. John 1:17

I have come to call sinners and to give you life. Mark 2:17; John 10:10

I have come to do the will of the Father. John 12:47

I have come to give drink to the thirsty and sight to the blind. John 7:37; 9:39

I have come to light the world, so that no one who believes will stay in darkness. John 6:33; 12:46

I have come so that my people may have eternal life. John 6:40

I have come to show you God. John 1:18

Born 2,000 years ago, Jesus continues to be our shepherd, our light, our redeemer. Tonight we are humbly thankful for his earthly life. Thank you, Jesus…

“As long as it is day, we must do the work of him who sent me. Night is coming, when no one can work.”
John 9:4

When I was younger, my parents made my brother and I mow the lawn. Now I look back and understand my parents’ desire to build character and work ethic in us as well as to get the necessary job done. However, I’ll admit that at the time I did not appreciate their higher motives! You see, the yard is about ½ an acre, and there are multiple trees planted around it (if you have never mowed around trees, then you will not fully understand the frustration that they add to mowing the lawn!). Dad refused to buy a riding lawn mower, stating that he had two perfectly strong children who could push the cheaper mowers! So, Dan and I each weekly mowed 1½ hours in order to fulfill our responsibility. Some times we tried to make a game out of it by either racing each other or even playing tic-tac-toe on the lawn. Some weeks, however, we procrastinated until just before the parental deadline. On those days we often were out as the sun was setting and dusk settled. Have you ever tried to mow the lawn in the dark? It is very difficult to follow your previously mowed line so that no patches are left! The darker it became, the more hunched over the mower we became as we searched for the way to go; the work got progressively more difficult the darker it got!

It is hard to work in the dark. It is difficult to see where you’ve been and where you are going. Has your life ever felt like that? Sometimes, as we live day to day, it feels like we are living and working in the dark. Each step we take, each decision made, each moment feels like we are stepping out into the unknown. We try to evaluate our present decisions with a perspective of the past and a gaze into the future, but in reality we cannot see connections. Life sometimes means we take a step, day to day, moment by moment, with the understanding that we are living in the dark. This is frustrating. I mean, I truly want to follow God, to make godly decisions, and to live a life pleasing to him. However, often I don’t know which decision to make, which place to put my time, or what attitude to have in a situation. Life sometimes feels dark.

This is not surprising to Jesus. In the above verse, Jesus admits that there is a shadow of darkness surrounding our lives. We cannot see the future nor do we understand how our current situation reflects our past. We must just step, day by day, moment by moment, praying that God will guide our steps.

I am reading the book Let Me Be a Woman by Elizabeth Elliot, and she answers the quandary of day to day faith-living by admonishing us to live in the moment. We cannot see the future. We cannot live in the past. This moment of this day is where we are living, and we must take the steps necessary to get to the next moment. It may not always be easy, but we can and should strive to have an attitude of joy even though darkness seems to surround us. In fact, if we do not choose joy, then we will wallow in the darkness without a goal or purpose. Just as I could not stand still while mowing in the dark, assuming that the job would get done without my forward steps, so we cannot just stand still in our lives. If we do choose to stand still, wallowing in our indecision or lack of direction, then we will miss out on completing the jobs that God has for us in our lives.

“How can you believe if you accept praise from one another, yet make no effort to obtain the praise that comes from the only God?”
John 5:44

Every day we hear updates on the news about the conflicts the United States is engaged in overseas. Although right now is not the time for me to write about my own political views, I will quickly give a “Thank you” to all of the soldiers who are allowing us to have our freedom. No, this blog is not about political battle but the other battle that we often do NOT hear about: spiritual battle.

Some friends of mine attend a church where the pastor just resigned because of some moral issues with a woman who is not his wife. My heart aches for this pastor, his wife and family, and their congregation which will undoubtedly face turmoil. However, I refuse to have a “holier-than-thou” attitude towards this pastor because here is a fellow Christian who, in the midst of the spiritual battle, has fallen. Yes, he will face consequences. No, he should not be “let-off-the-hook.” He did make wrong choices that led down a path of increasing sin and so God will deal with him. Sadly, he is a soldier who has fallen, and only God can heal him. Although pastors are the high-profile fallen soldiers, there are many others among the ranks.

This morning, as I prayed for those involved in that situation, God brought to mind these other fallen soldiers who I know. Face after face came to mind, and I will admit I began to cry because these are hurting people who are choosing to give up the battle with sin. Of course, I realize that I cannot know the heart of others, but God does. That knowledge brings me humbly to my knees admitting my own sin, and it also keeps me praying for others as I see sin creeping in and sabotaging the battle. What makes us get weak in the fight?

This morning as I read in John, I got one answer. Read the above verse. We work hard to attain praise from others – our co-workers, our boss, our spouse, our friends, our fellow church members. We want them to praise us, and so we go to extraordinary measures to assure that we do not offend them. We want everyone to know how wonderful, smart, pious, and funny we are. We seek praise from others. Now, having people like is us is not a sin. The problem comes when we forget the other part of the verse.

We make no effort to obtain praise from God. As we talk and through our actions, do we show that we care about obtaining praise from God, or are we making little concessions figuring that God wouldn’t really fault us for little sins? We need to act as if we want to obtain God’s praise. Only then will we guard against the enemy and ensure that we do not become one of the wounded and fallen. Most of us, if we are honest, will acknowledge that there are areas of our lives that we live with our eyes focused on ourselves or on the praise of others rather than on the praise of God. We need to honestly pray about those areas. Then, with the attitude of knowing that we could easily be one of the fallen, we can humbly move onto the next step.

We all know people who have fallen. I encourage you to take some time and allow God to bring to mind those who you know. Pray for those people. They are wounded; they are hurting (although they may be in denial about that!). We need to pray for our fellow soldiers because God can heal the fallen.

“This miraculous sign at Cana in Galilee was the first time Jesus revealed his glory. And his disciples believed in him.”
John 2:11

These past few weeks have been a bit of a whirlwind as we have had many guests (see previous blog), and celebrated a wonderful Thanksgiving. I suppose that, because of the unrest around me, I should not be surprised that this morning my thoughts continued to be a bit scattered. Interestingly, God used those swirling thoughts to converge in bringing me amazement over the miracle of Christmas. So, are you ready for some scattered thoughts?

First, it is now the Christmas season. Obviously that is foremost in many of our minds! Decorating, shopping, planning menus, attending the concerts of all three children (at three different schools), as well as some church activities. So, Christmas is on the brain. Swirling thoughts of Christmas…

In order to keep my mind focused on the true reason for Christmas, I decided that for my devotions I would go through the gospel of John. Studying the life of Jesus seems appropriate as we celebrate his birth into our world. This morning I read John 2, the account of Jesus’ first miracle. Jesus, his mother and his disciples were invited to a wedding in the town of Cana. Unfortunately, the primary beverage, wine, ran out. Jesus’ mother roped him into solving the problem. Interestingly, Jesus chose the Jewish ceremonial washing jars to fill with his wine (vs. 6). I began thinking about his changing the use of these religiously-important jars into a holding tank for the miraculous wine that he created out of water (think about that one for awhile – it is not what I am writing about now, but it is an interesting irony). Anyway, the primary gist of the story obviously stood out: Jesus used his power to simply and easily change water into wine. Swirling thoughts of Jesus’ power….

Today Ryan does not have school because of parent-teacher conferences. So, while I was reading the above passage, Ryan was sitting at the coffee table drawing a picture. He had a specific image in mind of what he wanted his picture to look like, but he was unable to draw exactly what his mind saw so he was becoming increasingly frustrated with himself. I watched as he battled this incongruence between what his brain knew and what his fingers were able to accomplish. Swirling thoughts of human inability….

All three thoughts suddenly converged. Jesus is God – powerful enough to immediately change the molecular structure of water into wine. And yet, we celebrate Jesus’ birth at Christmas. Jesus took on a human body. This means that Jesus was once a baby, once a little boy. As a little boy, he would have the bodily restrictions that all little boys have. Then it hit me – did Jesus, the all-powerful God who created palm trees, ever sit trying desperately to use his limited physical body to draw a palm tree? Think about this for a minute. I wonder if he ever got frustrated with his physical body. This thought doesn’t sound very deep, but if you actually stop to ponder it, it is a profound reminder of Jesus’ sacrifice for us.

Jesus took on a human body. He may have struggled with his muscle coordination as he learned to walk, to write his name, to draw a tree. I know I get frustrated, just as Ryan did, when I struggle to do something that I think I should be able to do. How much more Jesus must have gotten frustrated. That’s another miracle of Christmas – the God with all power had to be patient with the inabilities of his human body. The miracle of Christmas continues to amaze me.

“Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen…Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other just as in Christ God forgave you.”
Ephesians 4:29, 31-32

Well, the holiday season is now upon us. Most of us will probably either have family come to our home or go to visit someone during the Thanksgiving/Christmas season. Of course, that means some fun family times including telling stories, playing games, and eating meals together. Family time is fun. However, even for the best of families, there is the potential for conflict, and the holiday season is a perfect time for that to emerge. Think about it – a large group of people who know each other well (but who are actually not connected in day-to-day life) are crammed into a few rooms for a few hours or days. That is only a recipe for conflict and discontent!

I have read articles in various popular magazines about how to survive the holiday season, and I will admit that many of them have good advice that is actually biblicaly (although they would probably be appalled to know that!). How do we have holiday happiness?

Do not let unwholesome talk come out of your mouth. This is not just dirty jokes, but it is anything that does not build someone up and encourage them. Be kind. Be compassionate. Do not let anger control you, but forgive each other. Love and serve others (5:2).

As I was thinking about that list this morning, I realized my attitude towards some of the upcoming family times is less than godly. So, in my mind I determined that I would serve without complaining. Cook and clean up without grumbling. I would be kind and ooze with loving actions for everyone who enters my home during this season (actually, we have already had quite an entourage of people stay here throughout November!). But you know what? As I started to think about this, I could feel the knot inside. Yes, I would act loving and serving, but I realized that it would be with a martyr attitude that would probably not be detected by anyone but me. However, I would know it. I would feel the pride in my own loving, serving actions. I would realize the sacrifice I was making by opening my home up, by giving my time and attention to those staying with us. This is where the biblical way of handling the holidays differs from the popular magazine advice.

The outward actions of both the Bible and the holiday advice to forgive, love, and be kind is the same. However, the inner motivation is different. We should not do it so that we are the prideful, sacrificial martyrs. No, our attitude should actually flow from real love for all of our guests. And so, I began to pray for that real love that would under gird the actions.

What is your attitude toward your family and guests this season? It doesn’t matter whether we are visiting someone or someone is visiting us, we should not only appreciate and enjoy our families, but actually serve them with a love that can only come from God. Love is the ingredient that will give strength to our actions of kindness, service and forgiveness. When we live this out, then we will have true holiday happiness.

“His intent was that now, through the church, the manifold wisdom of God should be made known to the rulers and authorities in the heavenly realms, according to his eternal purpose which he accomplished in Christ Jesus our Lord. In him and through faith in him we may approach God with freedom and confidence.”
Ephesians 3:10-12

How do you approach God? When you pray are you usually sitting in your recliner, casually talking to God? Do you usually pray while maneuvering through traffic as you drive? Do you usually pray on your knees or flat on your face on the ground? I’ll admit that I do all of those, and I don’t think there is anything wrong with any of them. We do need to have our times of kneeling or flat-on-your-face praying as we are overwhelmed with the sovereignty and power of the creator whom we serve. However, we also can and should have friendly chats with our Father and friend as we drive and relax.

God is our friend and yet the creator of the world, and our prayer life should reflect that strange dichotomy. As the verse above says, we can approach God, the all-powerful creator, with freedom and confidence. As I read that today, I was again struck with that thought. We can approach GOD with freedom and confidence. Why? Because we have faith in Jesus. We are part of God’s family. Somehow, although we are sinful people, Jesus’ forgiveness makes it so that we can freely and confidently approach the omniscient, omnipotent God. Does this baffle you?

If this fact doesn’t astound you, then take a minute and think about it. It should astound and amaze you. It should cause us to go flat-on-our-face as we are overwhelmed with God’s goodness to us. God, in his wisdom, has allowed us Gentiles to be a part of his family.

We are not the only ones who are amazed that we Gentiles are able to freely and confidently approach God. Did you catch the first verse? When Jesus died and gave us free access to God, God showed his “multifaceted” wisdom not only to us but to someone else. Who is it? “The rulers and authorities in the heavenly realms.” The angels, the heavenly rulers, demons and Satan did not know of God’s plan until God revealed his wisdom in allowing Jesus to die and bring all of us who believe into his family. We, the church, are actually being used by God to teach the non-earthly rulers and authorities about the wisdom of God. That’s quite a high calling!

When I read that, my immediate reaction was, “Uh oh, I am being used to teach the spiritual realm??? What if I goof??” The good news is – this verse is not really about us. It is not saying that we have some high calling in teaching or need to be flawless in order to teach the non-earthly rulers. No, it is saying that God’s actions toward us (not our actions toward God) are what teach the heavenly rulers. God’s wisdom and love, as he sent Jesus and as he accepts all of us who have faith in Jesus into his family, are what teach the rulers.

So, as you casually pray to your friend and Father, God, remember that this prayer, this ability to be part of God’s family, is actually teaching the angels and Satan about God’s wisdom. That fact alone should cause us to fall to our knees before the all-wise, all-powerful King who rules the world.

Well, today I was out in the garden wearing long underwear, jeans, a turtleneck, sweatshirt and winter jacket. You may wonder why in the world I was out there, since gardening weather has definitely passed. Well, I was trying to get out as many weeds as possible (how did they grow so well in the cold??) so we can put a layer of chopped up leaves to decompose over winter. You would think that, with the cold, the gray skies, the abundance of weeds, and the runny nose (did I mention that?) it would be a bit of a downer day. However, I’ll admit it wasn’t. I do get downer days, but because of what I’ve been thinking about in my devotions, today wasn’t one of them.

Since this blog is not the place where I go into elaborate explanations of passages (aren’t you glad?), I’ll let you dig into this yourself (no garden pun intended!).

I am starting to read Ephesians, and the first few verses have completely overwhelmed me with God’s graciousness and abundant blessing. Here, read it…

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ. For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love he predestined us to be adopted as his sons through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will— to the praise of his glorious grace, which he has freely given us in the One he loves. In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace that he lavished on us with all wisdom and understanding.

Paul wrote this, and it is clear that he is overwhelmed as well. I mean, look at all the descriptive words he uses…

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ. For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love he predestined us to be adopted as his sons through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will— to the praise of his glorious grace, which he has freely given us in the One he loves. In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace that he lavished on us with all wisdom and understanding.

Just think about God’s love for us – blessing us with every spiritual blessing, lavishing rich grace on us, freely bringing us into his family. If there was ever something to think about that will bring us up out of a downer day, then this is it! So, bundle up and enjoy these gray, chilly days because we know that God is abundantly and overwhelmingly loving us.

“For this reason, since I have heard of your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, I do not cease to give thanks for you when I remember you in my prayers.”
Ephesians 1:1-16

What a wonderful weekend. Last weekend I spoke at the Montrose Bible Conference’s Ladies’ Retreat (see my previous entry). It was a wonderful weekend (Did I say that already? hehe). Each meal I tried to sit at a different table so that I could meet different women, and I also was able to talk with others before and after the sessions. Because of these interactions, I heard many of their stories, and I was so touched.

These were women (like those of you who I know read this blog), who love God. They did come to the weekend for rest and relaxation, but they also came to grow spiritually. As I listened to their lives, I was amazed at some of the trials they have gone through. And yet, here they were, determined to grow their faith in God.

We all have stories. Even as I am writing this, various people who I know read this blog are coming to mind (as well as many faces from this weekend). For each one of you who are coming to mind, I will tell you that I thank God for you. So many of you are inspirations for my own walk of faith. Thank you for sharing your stories and your lives with me.

This past weekend has me again thankful for some simple things. For instance, we can talk and communicate. I wonder if part of why God allows us to communicate is for us to share our stories, our trials, and the ways God has touched our lives. Without the gift of communication, we would all be lone islands, without the encouragement, hope and inspiration that other’s stories gives.

And so, I thank each of you for your investment in my life. I thank you for sharing your stories, your disappointments and your struggles. Thank you for sharing how God has touched your lives. I say with the apostle Paul, “For this reason, since I have heard of your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, I do not cease to give thanks for you when I remember you in my prayers.”

First just a brief update/prayer request: This weekend I am going to the Montrose Bible Conference’s Ladies’ Retreat as the speaker. I would greatly appreciate your prayers for both me and the women who will be there. Please pray that God would make me say what he wants me to say and keep me from saying anything false, harmful or hurtful. I will be speaking 4 times: Friday night, Saturday morning, Saturday night and Sunday morning. We will be talking about the 5 women that Matthew lists in his genealogy of Jesus. Please pray also that God will speak to the women who attend, whether it is through the worship times, the times I am speaking, the friends they have or will make, or the relaxing atmosphere. Thank you! I don’t always know exactly who reads this, but once in a while someone will pop up with a, “I read your blog last week,” so I know there are some people who read it! I do appreciate your prayers. As I always say, please let me know how I can pray for you as well.

Secondly, I am finishing up reading Galatians in my devotions. A few days ago a few verses from chapter 5 popped out at me, and since I have been pondering them, I thought I would just list them here for you to ponder. Of course, it is a bit dangerous to just list verses out of context. If you have any questions about what they mean, look them up. However, first I suggest you read them over – take your time and really think about them. Then pray about them. Perhaps they will hit you as they have me….

“For in Christ Jesus neither circumcision nor uncircumcision has any value. The only thing that counts is faith expressing itself through love.” (5:6)

“You were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the sinful nature; rather, serve one another in love. The entire law is summed up in a single command: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’” (5:13)

“If you keep on biting and devouring each other, watch out or you will be destroyed by each other.” (5:14)

Read. Pray. Ponder. Love. Serve. Hmmm.